Fear the Robots

What's worse than actors? Robot actors.

2011-05-25T22:32:00.001-04:00

We're sure that a RoboThespian is better than Hugh Jackman.

Robots Can't Even Leave our Pastimes Alone

2011-05-25T22:27:00.001-04:00

This is just another reason to hate the Phillies.

Robot Babies Will Never Be Cute

2011-05-25T22:24:00.001-04:00

Meet the Pneuborn-711.

Robots are going to Space

2011-03-27T21:36:00.000-04:00

Scientists from the University of Southampton have the nefarious idea of sending robots into space. Not just any robots- insect robots. More specifically, they would like to use "a swarm of small robots to cover more ground more swiftly and with more redundancy than is possible with a single large device, with the multiple machines relying on a system called 'quorum sensing.'"

So once they become self-aware and take over Earth, we won't even have anywhere out in space to escape to!

Proof Of Our Impending Demise

2011-03-09T09:44:00.000-05:00

They said it, not us!

Is This Uncanny Valley-Scaling Robot Proof Of Our Impending Demise?

Not a Lapdog

2011-03-01T11:26:00.002-05:00

Robots are Faster Than You

2011-02-17T09:20:00.000-05:00

Yeah, that's right- Robots can now run marathons. The most running you've done is to the refrigerator to grab some pudding.

We are Toast

2011-02-16T11:08:00.000-05:00

Sherry Turkle, Director of MIT's Initiative on Technology and Self declares that the "robotic moment" has arrived for the human race. Her prediction- "we are toast." Cue the doomsday music.

CNN Predicts the Future

2011-02-15T09:44:00.001-05:00

From CNN- "The computers haven't proven to be our trivia overlords just yet."

Is nothing sacred to the robots? Why can't they leave our game shows alone?

Now Shipping!

2011-02-01T11:16:00.003-05:00

Be afraid, be very afraid.

Headline: Anybots Are Now Shipping

Oh great, now just anybody with $15,000 can form an alliance with the robots. These are scary times. No one seems to be concerned that Anybots feature a "low-power laser beam".

This Can't Be Good

2011-01-28T10:52:00.002-05:00

Sent in by an alert reader from the US-

Robot uses Humans as Punching Bag

2010-10-19T00:19:00.005-04:00

A robot in Slovenia is using humans as a punching bag. Researchers are trying to determine if there is a way to create robots that cannot harm humans, so as to avoid all together Asimov's First Law of Robotics, that a robot can never harm a human or allow one to be harmed. We all know it only takes one rogue robot to break that rule, but is having robots punch humans the best way?

What if the robot gets ahold of an old NES Mike Tyson's Punch Out cartridge!? We're all in trouble then.

Robot with a Rat Brain. . . No Seriously.

2010-10-07T01:31:00.002-04:00

Researchers have created a robot that interfaces with a rat brain. The neurological signals apparently control the robot. Great now robots can interface with our brains. Hope they're gentle!

Neo Learns. . .

2010-09-30T00:53:00.002-04:00

Neocortex is a software designed to allow robots to 'learn' from their environment, rather than being programmed to do a specific task.

I'm not sure if I'm more scared of the Little Indian robot getting his circuits on this, or that the software has Neo in the name. That can't be good. . .

Robots Only Need 8 Tries To Kill You

2010-09-26T20:41:00.003-04:00

Apparently this robot taught itself to hit a bullseye in 8 attempts. Not exactly fast, but if you've fallen and can't get up, this robot would have you for sure!

The Robot is also holding auditions for the first Robot Village People.

New Japanese Prime Minister is a Robot. . .

2010-09-15T23:33:00.002-04:00

. . .Well not yet at least, but Japan is looking to replace much of it's work force with these HRP-4 robots.

Holy Voltron-Terminator Batman!

This wasn't even the freaky looking one with a girls face either! (pic1, pic2, pic3)

World Cup 2050: Robots WIN!!!!!

2010-09-15T23:15:00.002-04:00

Apparently Robot soccer is a real sport, or at least they have a governing body for their Robo-World Cups.

The researchers goal: Robots beat humans by 2050.

Robots goal: Beat humans.

Robots are Liars

2010-09-13T22:39:00.000-04:00

Or at least they're learning how to be liars.

Robots Want to Get You Drunk

2010-09-13T22:27:00.001-04:00

If it were up to robots, they would get you drunk so you would be incapacitated and they could then harvest your organs, steal your money, and other nefarious actions. Unfortunately, the folks over at Willow Garage created a robot that will fetch beer. Be on the lookout for this, and you might want to lock your refrigerator.

Tender Terminators

2010-09-12T23:54:00.005-04:00

New Artificial Skin has been created that can sense the touch of a butterfly.

Great, now the terminators will be able to tell if they are crushing a butterfly, or our skulls.

Then again, maybe the robots will just use the factory mass produced epidermal cells the French are making.

Robots Get SMRT

2010-09-07T23:25:00.002-04:00

According to an article in the August edition of New Scientist artificial life forms have evolved basic intelligence. Researchers at Michigan State University (MSU) have created 'life forms' that live in a computer and replicate by using computer code, rather than DNA. These life forms, called Avidians, apparently evolve over generations and have exhibited what some call a basic form of memory.

I just hope they don't combine these with robot elephants, or those robots will never forget!

Robots Steal Jobs

2010-08-18T12:43:00.000-04:00

Robots will Steal your Wife or Girlfriend

2010-07-23T10:24:00.000-04:00

If you give them the chance, they will seduce the one you love! Be on your guard.

Robots Care About Physical Fitness

2010-07-22T15:03:00.000-04:00

According to The Sun, this robot can walk 14 miles (in a row) in just 11 hours. Great, now robots are more physically fit than I am.

Is Lance Armstrong a Robot?

2010-05-20T09:54:00.002-04:00

Look closely.

Holy Matrimony

2010-05-19T23:42:00.000-04:00

You've probably all seen this by now- a robot conducted a wedding in Toyko. You would think those in Tokyo would be more sensitive about the influence of robots, especially considering the warnings they've been given through fictional (?) accounts of a robotic Godzilla. That's right, the same city that had to be saved from Mechagodzilla is the same city that allows a brain of wires and circuits to conduct a wedding.

Lock Your Doors

2010-05-10T21:58:00.002-04:00

The BBC reports how the Germans are willing to recognize what officials in the US deny- robots in the home equal trouble (big trouble). These brave German scientists fearlessly armed a robot with "a variety of bladed household tools including a steak knife, kitchen knife, scissors and screwdriver." Miraculously, they all survived, and reported how "Deep cuts resulted in most cases." (Big surprise) I don't care how helpful Rosie appeared to be, I'm drawing a line, and declaring that the only safe robot for the home is the Roomba vacuum.

(Thanks to alert reader @AdamW for the tip!)

Who Would Win?

2010-04-17T19:00:00.003-04:00

I'm not sure who would win, but I can guarantee who would lose- the humans.

CNN is Irresponsible

2010-04-16T17:06:00.000-04:00

Thanks a lot CNN. You just had to haul off and try to make a joke out of all this. Good grief. Instead of pointing out the scary nature of National Robotics Week, they decide to print an apologetic and claim that some robots are "good" and some are "bad". Who gave them the right to make this arbitrary moral judgement? Seriously, what good is a real life R2-D2 going to do against an army of Terminators?

Robots are Getting Smaller!

2010-03-24T12:50:00.000-04:00

Students at the University of Tsukuba apparently aren't afraid of robots, even when they (the robots) are tiny. They have begun building robot babies in an attempt to "motivate young people to start planning a family and boost the country's plunging birth rate." Well those intentions are nice now, but everyone knows that baby robots only grow up to become large, menacing killer robots. Not so cute then, are they?

Robots for Everyday Use

2010-03-18T13:35:00.002-04:00

They're Learning Martial Arts

2010-03-09T10:06:00.000-05:00

A graduate school at the University of Tokyo continues to work on a robot (named Kojiro) that knows martial arts! CNET News reports how this robot has 60 degrees of motion. Kojiro has artificial bones, ligaments, and tendons within his soulless body. CNET envisions a time when this robot fights another robot from Honda. Isn't that hilarious! Why would the robots fight each other when they can join forces and fight us? Think it through CNET!

Keep an Eye on your Phone

2010-03-06T22:12:00.000-05:00

Wired news recently ran a story about the Android (powered by Google) providing a "brain" for a robot. I think we should be especially nervous when they don't even disguise the names of their products. The Android? Seriously?

Is She a Robot?

2010-02-19T10:37:00.001-05:00

This is Flo, the increasingly annoying lady in the Progressive Auto Insurance Commercials.

Is she a robot?

And Now a Word from the Enemy

2010-02-19T10:32:00.001-05:00

Robots in Higher Education

2010-02-17T21:32:00.001-05:00

What do you think goes on at college? Parties? Studying? The destruction of mankind? Well, the nice folks at M.I.T have decided to go with helping our automated enemies gain intelligence. One of their projects is the Personal Robotics Group. Their slogan/mission statement is Living Better with Robots. I'll give you a minute to shake off the hebejeebies after reading that.

Ok, thanks for coming back. Anyway, the Personal Robotics group is currently hard at work. Here is how they characterize what they are doing-

We are developing a team of 4 small mobile humanoid robots that possess a novel combination of mobility, moderate dexterity, and human-centric communication and interaction abilities.

There you have it folks- forget curing cancer or coming up with alternate fuel sources, our best and brightest are working to come up with artificial intelligence that will one day become self-aware and then turn on us.

Robots are going to Space

2010-02-05T13:44:00.000-05:00

Leaders in ground and air transportation (a.k.a. NASA and GM) recently hatched a sinister plot to send robots to space. According to MSNBC, their evil product, the Robonaut2, will "do the same types of tasks that human spacewalkers do." Of course they try to make the robot blend in by giving it "a human torso, head, arms, hands and fingers." Great, once Earth is so messed up that we can't stay here anymore and we're forced to move to space, the robots will already be there....waiting.

PETA Loves Robots (oh, and Happy Groundhog Day)

2010-02-02T10:52:00.002-05:00

NPR recently ran a story indicating that the animal rights group PETA is advocating a change in a time honored American tradition. According to this story, PETA would like to replace the cute, cuddly mammal named Punxsutawney Phil with a robot!

Oh great, what's next- getting rid of the bald eagle in favor of a robot eagle? How about eating robot turkey at Thanksgiving? Be wary folks, and stay vigilant.

Kenny Albert Might be a Robot

2010-01-29T09:13:00.001-05:00

Just look at his face.....

Robots in Asia

2010-01-22T11:28:00.004-05:00

CNET.com recently ran this headline-

"Korean housemaid robot does laundry"

So apparently robots want to invade all areas of our life- even down to our chores. Oh sure, it sounds nice, "Now I don't have to wash these old stained t-shirts!" but come on, think about (maybe you should first think about why your t-shirts have so many stains. We are a little worried about you). Regardless of your poor hygiene, we are worried about the real reason(s) robots want to be rooting around through our smelly socks and dirty underwear.

Another Infiltration

2010-01-21T09:50:00.001-05:00

Apparently Google thinks that it isn't a big deal to let robots do a lot of their work. In a recent post, they casually admitted-

To show these ads, our systems don't need to store any extra information -- Gmail just picks a different recent email to match. The process is entirely automated: no humans are involved in selecting ads, and no email or personal information is shared with advertisers.

Don't let their fancy word play fool you- they have robots on staff!

Guest Post

2010-01-15T09:26:00.005-05:00

Today we have a guest post from an already devoted reader. He writes-

"....just wanted to contribute what i can to the cause. Here are some nuggets of info that i've found...I was doing some research, and found the website "therobotlab"

I think it's important to note that people are beginning to purchase robots that mow their lawn, vacuum their house, clean their pool, etc. But what if these robots rebel?

Also, some scary pictures I've attached showing the use of robotics to mimmick some of the scariest creatures known to man. Specifically dinosaurs, bears and sharks.

Thanks for everything you're doing."

Scary stuff!

Robot Cooperation

2010-01-13T18:56:00.000-05:00

Once the robots become self aware and discover that they are powerful, the might combine forces. The smarter ones will join together to create a GIANT ROBOT. Nothing could be more scary.

A Worthy Hero

2010-01-13T09:34:00.000-05:00

I know he isn't real (yet, check back in 2,000 years) but I find Magnus the kind of hero that we can all appreciate.

Robots Try to Distract Us

2010-01-12T17:01:00.000-05:00

Robots for kids?

2010-01-12T16:52:00.000-05:00

Everyone acts like robots are ok, and they even let their kids interact with robots. Perhaps parents would be wise to consider how dangerous robots can be. If they let their child play with robots, the robot might eventually fuse with the child-

Military Robots

2010-01-12T16:44:00.000-05:00

From Foxnews.com-

Israel is developing an army of robotic fighting machines that offers a window onto the potential future of warfare.

and-

"We are moving into the robotic era," says Mr. Katz.

You don't think that is scary? Robot armies? Come on....For now they're fighting for us, but what about when they decide to fight against us?

Robots Are Scary

2010-01-12T16:33:00.000-05:00

Robots are everywhere- and their presence is only increasing. Aren't they really scary?